


Last Winter's Moon

by darkchakram



Category: The 100 (TV)
Genre: Amazons - Freeform, Bathing/Washing, Canon Divergence, Crossdressing, F/F, Femslash, Fluff, Grounder Culture, Holiday, Massage, Passing, Post 3x06, Slow Burn, Smut, breast binding, grounders
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-03-08
Updated: 2017-04-22
Packaged: 2018-10-01 03:51:05
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 6
Words: 13,781
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10180058
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/darkchakram/pseuds/darkchakram
Summary: Set in Season Three but not canon compliant because in my world Lexa is not dead and Clarke is still the ambassador for Skaikru. So let’s just say canon until 3X07.Summary: Clarke, Lexa, Last Winter’s Moon Festival. Fluff & Smut and I’m not ashamed to admit it.





	1. Holiday

It had been two days since Clarke had decided to spare Emerson’s life. Two days of reassuring herself that she’d made the right decision,two days of Titus glaring at her murderously every time they were in the same room together, and two days of Lexa reaffirming that blood must not have blood was the future of their people. Their people. Our people. Lexa used those terms more often than not now. And even though Clarke knew that the Commander meant the people of the thirteen clans, Clarke couldn’t help but feel that sometimes when they were alone what Lexa really meant was that the two of them were united. 

Clarke rinsed her mouth with mint water and spit it out into the basin before checking her reflection in the mirror. She decided that she should bathe and wash her hair. After all, she was going to have more time on her hands than usual. There would be no assembly today. It was a Grounder holiday in honor of the Last Winter’s Moon Festival, which began at sundown. A tradition that had emerged with Trikru and had slowly spread to some of the other clans. When Lexa had united the twelve clans, the Grounders had adopted it as a universal holiday. Clarke could hear the excitement already building in the streets below. 

Clarke slipped out of her robe and dressed in a pair of black leggings and a long sleeve shirt. The basin in her room was good for washing up but she didn’t have an actual tub. She was going to have to go to the bathing chamber shared by the female ambassadors which she was not looking forward to. It wasn’t so much the shared bath that bothered her. She’d grown used to not having much personal privacy ever since she’d landed on Earth. What irked her were the hateful and unwelcoming looks she received from the other ambassadors and their assistants. Still, Clarke didn’t want to go to the festival without thoroughly bathing and cleaning her hair. So, she grabbed a towel, slipped into a pair of fur loafers that Lexa had given her, and headed for the baths. 

As soon as she stepped from her room, there was a guard waiting for her. “The Commander would like to see you, Ambassador,” he called in a gravelly voice. 

“Oh. How long have you been waiting? Did you knock. I’m sorry.” Clarke wondered if he’d been there all morning. 

“The Commander said you weren’t to be disturbed. But she’d like to see you as soon as you are available.”

“Of course, I’ll head to the throne room.”

“It’s a holiday, Ambassador. You’ll find her in her quarters.”

“Right,” Clarke nodded and thought about tossing the towel back into her room but slung it over her shoulder instead. “I’ll head there now.”

The guard bowed and excused himself now that his duty was done. 

Clarke walked the expanse that separated her suite from Lexa’s at the other end of the hallway. One of the guards who waited there, cracked the door and announced Wanheda. Clarke winced at the name. She much preferred it when people referred to her as ambassador. She didn’t need to be reminded that she was a mass murderer.

The guard pushed the door open fully for Clarke to enter and then shut it behind her. 

Clarke had not been prepared for the image that greeted her. Lexa wore a long sleek blue robe over a full length cream colored gown. The medallion that she often wore on her forehead was absent. As was her makeup. Still, her green eyes managed to shine behind her long brown lashes. Her hair spilled over her shoulder like dark honey. Clarke ached to run her fingers through the silk heaven. She had to remind herself to breathe.

“Good morning, Clarke,” Lexa called softly and Clarke allowed herself to imagine that the longing she felt was reciprocated.

“You wanted to see me?” She didn’t mean it to come out so brusquely but being so near Lexa in such an intimate setting and not being able to act on the desire that pulled at her lower abdomen was frustrating.

Noticing the towel, Lexa pointed. “Were you headed for the baths?”

“I was. I thought I’d freshen up. You know, for tonight’s festivities.”

“Well, that’s convenient. I’ve called you here to ask if you would help me prepare for the evening.”

“Prepare?” Clarke wasn’t sure what sort of preparations were in order but she didn’t think there was anything she could deny Lexa anyway. 

“Yes, the Commander has an important symbolic role to play in the opening ceremony.”

“I see. Sure, anything I can do to help.”

“Good" Lexa gave Clarke one of her genuine smiles. And again Clarke thought she saw longing in the way Lexa held her gaze as her lips curled up. Lexa took a deep breath and then the smile was gone and Clarke could almost believe she'd imagined the whole interlude. "But first you should have that bath you want. I’ll have Catlan heat the water and you can have a bath here, if that suits you?”

“Is that appropriate?” Clarke knew if Titus found out that she was bathing in the Commander’s quarters he would have another one of his hissy fits.  


“People will talk.”

“Not if I cut out their tongues.” Lexa quipped but Clarke thought she might be only half joking. Still, she couldn’t help grin.

“Lexa. . .”

“Shh,” Lexa closed the space between them and placed a single finger on Clarke’s lips. “I was kidding. Look, if anyone asks, I’ll tell them that I needed you close at hand to help me prepare for tonight.” Lexa slid her finger from Clarke’s lips but let the tip of the digit linger over the dimple in Clarke’s chin, her eyes never leaving Clarke’s lips. Clarke half thought and fully hoped that Lexa was going to kiss her. Instead, the Commander bit her own bottom lip and pulled her hand away. “The bathroom is there, make yourself comfortable, I’ll send Catlan down now.” 

Clarke wasn’t sure what she’d been expecting but the Commander’s bathing chamber was far more luxurious than she’d imagined. Clarke guessed that at some time in the distant past that whoever had lived there must have come from the upper echelon of society. The white marble flooring was interlaced with streaks of gold and it ran the entire length and breadth of the room. Clarke stepped out of the fur loafers and put her bare feet down on the cold smooth floor. The sight of her dirty toes against the pristine and polished floor made her feel ashamed. Looking across the room, she became fully aware of why Lexa always looked so beautifully groomed and well-kempt. She had a fucking oasis just off her bedroom. Clarke was surprised to find the toilet lid opened and the bowl clean with water in it. She shook her head. She had to have answers. She craned her neck around the door frame and called to Lexa who had stayed in the bedroom to give Clarke her privacy.

“A minute, Lexa?” 

Lexa padded over to Clarke wearing one of her cocky half-grins. “Yes, Clarke?”

“What is all of this? You have a toilet? And, it works? Why have I been trudging down to the outhouses at three in the morning?”

“It’s one of the few creature comforts of being Heda. It’s been this way since the first Commander had the pump installed,” Lexa pointed to a pump that sat next to the massive porcelain tub. “The taps don’t work, nor does the shower head but the pump does.”

“So the water is heated below and you pump it up?” Clarke clarified.

“That’s right.”

“And the toilet?”

“Well, the water for the toilet doesn’t require heating. But basically, you take a bucket and fill the back of the toilet with water.”

“I know how toilets work, Lexa.” Clarke said in a more huffed tone than she intended. “What I meant. . .”

“If everyone knew about this Clarke, then everyone would want indoor plumbing and frankly even if we’d had the resources to make that happen, we’ve never had the time. War has been our constant. 

“I get it, I do. And, if you let one ambassador bathe in here, then you have to let them all. Look, maybe I should just go down to the ambassador’s bath hall.” Clarke certainly wasn’t looking forward to sinking into the tepid, used waters of the ambassador’s baths but she didn’t want to start another political crisis either.

“It’ll be fine. I told you, I will explain that you are serving as my attendant.”

“But I don’t even know what that entails,” Clarke was afraid that even Lexa choosing her as an attendant would cause an outcry.

“I’ll explain everything to you. Step by step.”

Clarke’s brow crinkled. She wasn’t convinced.

“It’s a great honor you know. You should be thanking me.”

This did nothing to relax Clarke. “That’s my point, Lexa. Your people may think that as an outsider I shouldn’t be given such an honor.”

Lexa took both of Clarke’s hands and turned her so that they were squared up. “Look at me, Clarke.” 

Clarke’s sky blue eyes landed on Lexa’s earthy green ones.

“You have to stop thinking of yourself as an outsider. You are a member of Skaikru, a member of the thirteenth clan. You are my people.”

Clarke swallowed. She knew that Lexa was right but knew that even if they believed it, there were many in the coalition who would never accept Skaikru.

“It doesn’t matter what anyone else thinks,” Lexa said as if she’d read Clarke’s mind and then she squeezed Clarke’s hands gently before letting them go. “Now, let’s get your bath started. We still have to get me prepped for tonight. 

Lexa walked over to the tub which was a great porcelain monstrosity magnificently framed in the same marble that tiled the floor. Lexa sat on the edge of the tub frame. “The water should be getting warm by now.” She started pumping and after a handful of jerks, water spouted forth. 

Clarke just shook her head. Would Lexa ever stop surprising her? As she watched the tub fill with water, she decided to just stop arguing about the appropriateness of her using the tub. She hung her towel on a nearby towel rack. “I can finish that.” She pointed to the pump.

“You want your privacy?” Lexa asked and Clarke thought she heard a quiver of disappointment.  
“Of course you do. Let me get you some soap and shampoo. Then I’ll let you be.”

Clarke felt her face reddened at the thought of Lexa watching her bathe. A naughty sprite inside her encouraged her to ask Lexa to join her in the bath. But Clarke pushed that voice to the back of her head. “Thank you.”

Lexa opened a drawer on the right side of the marble counter that served as a vanity and grabbed some glass jars and brought them to the tub. She unscrewed the lid of the least viscous of the the liquids, it was white and creamy and smelled faintly floral. “Do you like this?”

“Yes, it’s nice. What is it?”

“Honeysuckle soap. And this shampoo is lavender and this cream is also lavender scented but it makes your hair smooth and manageable.”

“Conditioner.”

“Yes,” Lexa smiled. “If you like them, you can have them.”

“I love them,” Clarke sniffed each one and was truly elated to have something besides the caustic lye bar that she’d bought at the market. 

“Good, they were Costia’s. They are yours now.” Lexa swallowed hard then turned to leave. Clarke didn’t know what to say, but her soul begged her to scream, ‘Can I be yours too?’ But she only watched Lexa leave.


	2. Mythology

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Clarke gets a lesson in Grounder myth.

Mythology

Clarke realized that she’d dozed off when she was awoken by voices coming from the other room. She pulled the plug from the drain and screwed the tops carefully back onto the glass jars that Lexa had given her, then stepped out onto a soft rug. Clarke took her time toweling off and dressing herself. She had planned on staying in the bathroom until she was sure that whoever was in the other room with Lexa had left. But, when she heard Titus raising his voice at Lexa, she figured that she and Lexa were in this fight together so she stepped into the bedroom.

Titus’ face was already red and worked up. Clarke noticed that his right fist was clenched in frustration. She also discovered that Lexa and Titus weren’t alone. A young serving girl of about thirteen stood at Titus’ left. 

Lexa turned and looked at Clarke as the blonde entered the bedroom. “As ambassador for Skaikru, Clarke needs to learn our ways, Titus. I can’t think of a better opportunity.”

“Heda, please don’t do this. Beja. I’ve spent weeks preparing Agon to perform the necessary duties .”

Lexa looked to the ginger-haired serving girl. “Mochof, Agon. You may leave.”

The girl bowed and did as her Heda commanded but with an apologetic glance at Titus. 

“Now Titus, get to your point. Which has nothing to do with Agon’s preparations.”

Titus’s temples throbbed noticeably. “Clarke, will you excuse us?”

Clarke considered leaving but only for an instant. Instead, she moved to stand at Lexa’s side. “The Commander has asked me to be her attendant. It is an honor that I do not take lightly. If Heda wants me to leave, she can ask me to.”

Lexa gave Clarke one single approving nod. And although her lips never moved, Clarke could see the pleasure twinkling in those green eyes.

“Heda wants you to stay right where you are,” Lexa turned to Titus. “You, on the other hand, may leave. I will see you at the procession tonight and not one minute before, Are we clear?” 

Titus took two deep breaths and then steepled his hands together. “Yes Heda.” He then glanced at Clarke before looking back to Lexa. “I will hold my tongue, if you swear to me that you will do your duty during the festival.” 

Lexa’s spine stiffened. “Have I ever failed to do my duty, Fleimkepa?”

“There are rumors.” Titus said between clenched teeth.  


“And nothing more. You are excused Titus. And don’t worry. I will fulfill my obligation.”

“Yes Heda,” Titus shuffled out of the room but couldn’t resist one last glare at Clarke. 

“I don’t wanna be the one to say I told ya so, but Titus took the news as I expected.” Clarke let out a breath she didn’t know she’d been holding.

“Thank you for standing by me, Clarke.” 

“Always,” Clarke answered but couldn’t look Lexa in the eyes when she said it, she was afraid the Commander would see the longing in her soul. “So what was all that business about your duty?”

“Let’s have some tea.” Lexa took Clarke by the left hand and guided her to the sofa where she poured them two cups of steaming tea. Setting the teapot aside, she took a stick of incense and lit if off of one of the burning candles, Lexa used the lit incense to bring to life the remaining dozen candles that sat on the table in front of them. Clarke took a moment to appreciate the delicate beauty that was Lexa. In moments like these it was easy to forget that Lexa was also a ruthless leader who could assassinate a political conspirator without batting an eye. 

Clarke tried the tea. It was earthy with only a hint of bitterness. “Mmmm, not bad.”

“Sprilla, yam leaf, raspba leaf, dama. Sorry, sarsaparilla, yam leaf, wild raspberry leaf, and I'm not sure what the gonasleng word for dama is. But it’s essentially a tea to promote fertility.” Lexa took a drink.

“Fertility?” Clarke nearly choked on her tea.

Lexa smiled. “Yes, Clarke. Fertility. After Pram Fire, the survivors understood the importance of repopulating the Earth. And since the coming of spring is also a time of great replenishing, our people celebrate fertility on the night of winter’s last full moon.”

“I see. The Ark was different. Because of our scant resources and life support systems we had a very strict one child policy. But if makes sense that Earth-based survivors would try to have more children.”

“Well, not too many because they also had limited resources. But of course in the early days, legend tells us, many of the infants did not survive the harsh environment. The Sheidjus helped.”

“But why the festival?” Clarke asked.

“In part, it was a way to honor Bekka Pram Heda for the gift of life she had given our people and a promise that we wouldn’t waste it.”

A crazy thought occurred to Clarke, her eyes widened. “Is this festival an orgy?”

“No, Clarke. It isn’t an orgy. It is inspired by classical mythology.” Lexa refilled their tea cups.  


“In what way?” Clarke relaxed against the couch back. She was fascinated by this bit of Grounder culture.

“After Bekka Pram Heda realized that the Sheidjus wasn’t being inherited by everyone, it became important to make sure that the Natblida reproduce, especially the Natblida women because a Natblida mother is more likely to produce Natblida offspring than a Natblida father.. So on this sacred night, Natblida women take their choice of male partner. Similar to how the Amazon women would raid the neighboring villages of men for their semen. If the Commander is female, then she gets the first choice of partners You've heard of the Amazons of Greek lore?”

“Yes, I know of the Amazons. A race of warrior women. But the Nightbloods are all children.”

“Now, yes. But, it wasn’t that way before. My conclave was the youngest ever. And no one who hasn’t reached adulthood engages in sexual activity. But all adults are encouraged to mate, even the non-Natblida. After the Commander retires to her hut with her chosen lover, the rest of the revelers choose their partners. Most people choose their own mates but sometimes people see an opportunity to explore outside of their partnerships.”

“That’s what Titus meant by do your duty?”

“Yes,” Lexa nodded.

“And the rumors? What rumors was he talking about?”

“That I don’t engage in coitus with the men I choose.”

“Do you?” As soon as Clarke asked, she realized that it was an entirely inappropriate question. She didn't know why but somehow the thought of Lexa lying with a man irked her. If she was being honest, the though of Lexa lying with anyone other than her, irked her.

Lexa drained her teacup and put it on the table before turning to Clarke. “No.”

“Don’t you believe in the. . .”

“Not for me. I understand the importance of producing Natblida, I do. But the thought of letting a man touch me in that way or be inside me.” Lexa shuddered.

“Hey, it’s okay.” Clarke sat up and edged closer to Lexa. “You shouldn’t have to do that if you find it repulsive.” 

“The priests. They are always worried about running out of Natblida.”

“Then why do they make them kill each other?”

“It’s our way.”

“Maybe it shouldn’t be.” Clarke sat her teacup on the table next to Lexa’s

“I was right to choose you.” Lexa pushed a wayward strand of Clarke’s still damp hair behind her ear. Clarke thought for a second that Lexa was going to cup her face but the brunette let her hand fall back to her own side. “We should get started.”

“I’m still not sure exactly what is expected of me.”

“I told you, I’ll explain as we go. I’ve been doing this since I was sixteen.”

“And you've managed to avoid consummation all those years?”

“Costia was my attendant and I always chose a man I could trust to keep my confidence. Lincoln.”

“Ahh, I see.” Clarke grinned.

“Is this the first festival without Costia?” Clarke had been curious about Lexa’s former lover but had never found an appropriate time to bring it up.

“It is. That’s why Titus is bent out of shape that I’ve chosen you. He thinks that it will make people talk about you and me the way they used to whisper about me and Costia. But more than that, he thought I would finally have to go through with the rite or at least that he would have a snitch if I didn’t.”

A sharp pang twisted in Clarke’s gut and gnashed at her heart. She’d been thinking that Lexa had chosen her for personal reasons but she’d only chosen her because she felt she could trust her not to inform on her to Titus. 

“So, are you ready to make me an Amazon Queen?”

Even though Clarke felt disappointment down to her toes, she couldn’t tell Lexa no. She smiled. “Yeah.”

Lexa stood up from the couch and slid the robe from her shoulders. “From now until the ceremony begins you will be my servant and I your Queen. Is that clear?”

“Yes, Lexa.”

“Is that how you would address your Queen?”

“No. . um. . . no. . no your Majesty.” Clarke stammered. 

“That’s better. Now, you will draw me a bath which you will scent with the oils you will find in the middle drawer of the vanity. Once you have the bath drawn and ready you will come get me, undress me, and clean me. Any questions?”

“No, Majesty.” Clarke lied. She had one really huge question. Why on Earth would Lexa go through all of this pomp and circumstance if she didn’t really intend on going through with having sex with the man she chose? But as much as Clarke was curious about why Lexa was going through with the preparations she wasn’t about to question it, not if playing along meant she was going to get to not only see Lexa naked but she was going to get to touch and bathe her. Clarke hurried into the bathroom and wondered if she should should take care of the burning ache between her legs before she called Lexa in for her bath. She wasn’t sure how she was going to make it through bathing Lexa with her already throbbing clit begging her to relieve it.


	3. Drowning

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Clarke helps Lexa prepare for the ceremony.

The water coming from the pump was hotter than Clarke would have liked but there was little she could do to control the temperature. Whomever was warming it from below had let the fire heating the water burn too long. Clarke cracked open the only window in the room. A crisp breeze puffed out the cream colored curtain. Satisfied that that would help cool the bath water, Clarke rummaged through the vanity drawer until she found the oils that Lexa told her would be there. Clarke sniffed the first glass bottle, she recognized the pungent scent of sage but the sweeter oil was harder to place. Jasmine maybe. Gardenia? Clarke poured a couple of drops of each of the oils into the water and stirred it around with her hand. It was still too warm for her and she didn’t want to burn Lexa’s beautiful skin. But then, she remembered that she still needed to undress Heda. So, she walked into Lexa’s bedroom and found her waiting patiently on her sofa. 

“I’m ready for you, Lexa.” Clarke called from the doorway.

Lexa gave her a pointed eyebrow.

Clarke felt ridiculous but she curtsied. “Apologies Majesty. I am ready for you, my Queen.”

“Thank you, Clarke kom Skaikru,” Lexa stood slowly and walked toward the blonde. Lexa felt awkward with Clarke calling her Majesty and Queen but she felt that it would add a layer of formality to the ordeal that she was going to need to get through it without ravishing Clarke. There had been a time that Lexa had thought that Clarke and she could have been lovers, maybe more, but Clarke had spurned her advances telling her that she wasn’t ready. And then, when Lexa had tried again by asking her to come with her to Polis, Clarke responded that she couldn’t really think about the future. Since Clarke had come to the capital as Wanheda, Lexa had been conscious not to make any bold overtures. Still, she’d dropped hints and hoped that Clarke could read her intentions, But Clarke seemed interested in no more than a political friendship between leaders. It was best, Lexa had decided, to keep up with the formality of the ritual that way she couldn’t fool herself into thinking that Clarke’s hands on her body was more than obligation. 

Lexa followed Clarke into the bathroom. The aroma of the oils was strong but pleasant. Clarke had done a fine job blending them. Lexa watched as Clarke walked over to the tub and tested the water. The blonde’s head bobbed up and down, “It’s ready.” Then she shut the window and made sure the curtain was drawn. Lexa wondered why she was concerned with the drapery, it wasn’t as if anyone could see that many stories up but she didn’t say so to Clarke. She just grinned to herself.

Clarke turned to the Commander and took in the sight of her in the blue robe and creamy gown. The moment of truth had come. She was about to take Lexa’s clothes off. Clarke scraped her bottom teeth across her top lip preparing for the frustration that she knew was coming. “Would you like me to help you out of those, Majesty?”

“You may.” Lexa stood still and waited for Clarke to come to her. Clarke took a deep breath, Lexa noticed the way it pushed her perfect breasts forward. 

“Am I washing your hair Majesty or would you like me to put it in a bun for you?” 

“I have to be cleaned everywhere, Ambassador. You can leave it down.”

Clarke felt her lower belly clench and her center quiver. She was going to have to wash Lexa in her most secret space. She closed her eyes and pulled her lips into her mouth as she cast her head downward This was going to be impossible to get through. 

Clarke’s reaction worried Lexa. She couldn’t quite read it. Clarke had closed her eyes which served as Lexa’s window to Clarke’s inner world. The way she was sucking in her lips made Lexa think that maybe the thought of cleaning her body somehow repulsed Clarke. She was beginning to wonder if she should have just let Agon attend to her. Maybe she should just dismiss Clarke and go through the motions of the ritual by herself. 

Clarke finally regained her composure. She looked at Lexa and forced a smile. She owed it to the woman to try to get through this without getting all hot and bothered. Clarke moved in behind Heda and slowly slipped the blue robe from Lexa’s shoulders and down her arms. Clarke’s knuckles grazed Lexa’s slender but toned arms as she removed the robe. Gooseflesh immediately pebbled along Lexa’s arms. “Are you cold? Maybe I shouldn’t have opened the window.”

Clarke had forgot to call her Majesty. Lexa didn’t bother to correct her. The effect of Clarke’s skin against hers had her completely rattled. “It’s not the air.” was Lexa’s only reply. 

The goosebumps made Clarke wonder if Lexa was perhaps ticklish. She quickly hung the robe on a golden hook that was mounted near the tub. Then turned her attention back to Lexa. She admired how feminine the woman looked standing before her in the ankle length satiny gown. The spaghetti straps displayed Lexa’s delicate collarbone and her sexy shoulders. She looked good enough to eat and Clarke’s appetite grew more voracious. Clarke couldn’t resist reaching out and fingering the black tattoo that ran down Lexa’s right bicep. 

Lexa inhaled sharply at the touch. Her heart raced as Clarke traced the swirling patterns with a light fingertip. “It’s beautiful.”

Lexa had to get her mind off of Clarke’s gentle caress. “I got it on my first anniversary of becoming Heda. Do you have any tattoos?”

“No.”

“You find them barbaric?” Lexa knew that Clarke had at one time thought her people to be savage. Maybe she still did.  


“It’s not that. I’ve just never had anything mean so much to me that I would want it permanently inked on my body.” Clarke answered and then realized that she’d forgotten to address Lexa as Majesty. She bowed apologetically, “Sorry Majesty.”

Lexa nodded silently. She was saddened that Clarke had chosen to return to a more formal tone but she knew it was for the best. Then as Clarke reached for the hem of her gown, she was beyond grateful for the switch.

Clarke had gone down on her haunches to grab Lexa’s hem. She rose up, pulling the fabric with her. She tried not to look at the silky panties that covered the Commander’s sex but her eyes fixated on the puffy patch at the top of her mound that pushed the fabric forward. Clarke tried not to imagine what Lexa’s brown curls would look like at the apex of her pink flesh but her mind betrayed her. She kept moving up Lexa’s body and literally gasped when she discovered that the brunette hadn’t been wearing a bra.

“What is it?” Lexa looked down at her chest when Clarke gasped.

“Nothing, Majesty.”

“Well, it’s something. You have seen breasts before, I mean you have a pair yourself.” 

“I guess I just thought you’d be wearing a bra, or something.”

“I see. Usually, I just tape them. It’s more practical when I’m fighting but sometimes I do wear a bra. But not generally here in my quarters.”

“I wasn’t judging. I was just . . .” Clarke was finding it difficult to form words with Lexa standing in front of her wearing nothing but silky white panties. “They’re beautiful.” Clarke couldn’t believe the words had left her mouth but they had and they hung there awkwardly between them as if they had an actual physical presence. 

Lexa had been waiting for any indication that Clarke was interested in more than friendship. Clarke’s comment gave her a ray of hope but she didn’t want to give too much weight to mere words. Still, she’d never wanted Clarke more than she did in that moment, standing nearly exposed in front of her. “Mochof.” 

“You’re welcome,” Clarke answered on reflex. It was all she had left. She wanted Lexa so bad her chest physically hurt. And she still had to take the damn panties off. As Clarke considered that fact, her eyes drifted back down to the white silk.

Lexa followed Clarke’s eyes. The blue eyes on her was doing delicious things to her center and she felt a fresh wave rush over her lips. She blushed hoping that Clarke couldn’t see the wetness through the undergarment.  


“Let me help you out of those, Majesty.” Clarke looked back up at Lexa's face. She was surprised to find the Commander's face flush.

“I can’t do this, Clarke. I’m sorry.” Lexa stepped away from her Skygirl. 

Clarke pulled her hand back from where she’d been reaching for Lexa’s panties. She felt as if she’d been slapped. “Did I do something wrong?” The last thing she’d wanted to do was disappoint Lexa. 

“No, no, it’s not that at all. You’re doing everything right.”

“It’s Costia, isn’t it?” Clarke had been afraid that she wouldn’t meet Lexa’s expectations. After all, Heda had spent the past few years doing this with her lover. A woman who knew all her intimate needs. 

“Costia? No.” Lexa shook her head. She realized that she hadn’t even thought once about her lost lover. Her focus had been trained solely on the beauty before her. How did she tell Clarke that all she wanted was her? She couldn’t. She’d vowed to herself that the ball was in Clarke’s court. 

“Then what?” Frustration was heavy in Clarke’s voice as she put a hand on Lexa’s shoulder to turn her. She was surprised that Lexa looked as frustrated as she felt. 

“Let’s just get this over with.” Lexa ripped her panties off and brushed by Clarke as she hurried to the tub. 

Clarke turned to follow her, now as confused as she was frustrated. And, more than a little disappointed that she hadn’t got a peek at Lexa’s pussy. Although she did get a nice view of the Commander’s ass before Lexa lowered herself into the tub and started sloshing the soap around to create bubbles. 

“Lexa, what’s going on? Just tell me what you want me to do and I will do it. I can’t read your mind.” Clarke sat on the edge of the tub and waited.

Lexa dipped her head under the water and came back up. “Shampoo.” 

“Fine,” Clarke decide if all Lexa was going to give her was one word answers, she’d respond in kind. Clarke filled her palm with the yellowish liquid and started working it through Lexa’s long hair. She was surprised to find that the thick mane had very few tangles. She was able to work up a lather rather easily. As she scrubbed the soap into Lexa’s hair, she took the time to massage Lexa’s head. Clarke was happy to see that the action had a calming effect on Lexa. Her neck relaxed and she let herself enjoy the sensations. Clarke loved vulnerable she looked with her head lolled back and her eyes closed to the world. Clarke took the opportunity to look at Lexa’s perfect face unabashedly. She ached to push her own lips against Lexa’s plump pink mouth and then to nibble along the chiseled jawline down to her slender throat.  
Lexa opened her eyes to find Clarke devouring her with hers. If Lexa had wondered before, Clarke’s ravenous look now left no doubt that the blonde wanted her too, and desperately if the need in her face was any indication. Still, Lexa couldn’t be sure if it was just sex that Clarke was interested in or if she wanted more as Lexa herself did. 

“Clarke,” Lexa whispered huskily.

“Sorry, I got distracted,” Clarke tore her eyes away from Lexa’s chest. Lexa’s rosy nipples peeked above the bubbles making Clarke want to lap at them as the water did. 

“Need to rinse.” Lexa dipped her head back in the water and ran her fingers through her own hair trying to get all the soap out. The arching of her back, brought more than her nipples up out of the water and Clarke nearly choked on her own spittle watching the suds stream over Lexa’s fine breasts. Clarke closed her thighs and flexed her center trying to fight the throbbing that demanded satisfaction. 

Lexa finished rinsing and sat back up. “Conditioner.”

All finesse gone, Clarke dumped a massive glob in her hand and started creaming it through the dark strands. “What’s next?” Clarke needed to know how much more torture she was going to have to endure without relieving herself.

“After the bath, you have to massage me with the proper oils from head to toe and then you'll dress me in the ritual outfit.” 

Clarke bit at the flesh where her lip met her inner cheek. No way she was going to get through this without embarrassing herself. “Lexa. . . I. . . .”

“Yes,” Lexa leaned forward hopeful that Clarke was about to reach her breaking point. 

Clarke shook her frustration off. Lexa had asked her to help her and it truly was a great honor and all Clarke had been able to do was act like a horny middle grader. “I’m honored that you chose me. Skaikru is honored. I’d like to thank you on behalf of my people.”

Her people!!!!! Lexa licked her lips and then clenched them in frustration. She dipped under the water to rinse the conditioner. She considered drowning herself, after all, she was already drowning in desire for a woman she might never be able to have!


	4. Everything

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Clarke and Lexa continue preparations for the Last Winter's Moon Festival.

Lexa had sent Clarke back into the bedroom to prepare the oil warmers for the upcoming massage while she toweled herself off. The whole situation was becoming much more frustrating than she had anticipated that it would be. It wasn’t that she had wanted to embarrass Clarke or torture herself, for that matter, it was just that she couldn’t imagine wanting anyone else’s hands on her that intimately. But the fact that she wanted Clarke more desperately than Clarke apparently wanted her was driving her insane. She was glad for the brief reprieve from the blonde goddess’ presence. 

Lexa sat on the small stool at the vanity and ran her butterfly comb through her wet hair before securing it with a dagger shaped hairpin carved from the femur of a deer. It had been a gift from Anya and Lexa treasured it dearly. Standing, Heda took her robe from the hook where Clarke had hung it, then pulled it over her shoulders and cinched it at the waist. She had been so certain that Clarke was going to break. She'd seen her admiring her breasts, her lips. The Skaigirl clearly desired her but not enough to act on that desire. She took a deep breath as she paused at the door to the bedroom. She was going to need all the resolve she could muster to not show Clarke how much her touches and caresses meant. With a glance heavenward, and a renewed determination, Lexa pushed open the door and turned the corner into her bedroom.

And. . . . she nearly choked. Clarke had taken it upon herself to undress. The golden beauty was sitting on her knees waiting for Lexa on the bed wearing nothing but her bra and panties. Lexa stopped abruptly, her mouth agape. It was official, Clarke was trying to kill her!

“Hey,” Clarke smiled. “I didn’t wanna get this all over my clothes,” Clarke held up a bottle of lavender oil. She’d already poured three bowlfuls of the essential oil in the burners but kept the bottle nearby in case she needed to replenish. “I hope this is okay.” She gestured to her half-nude form.

‘It’s more than okay, it’s the sexiest thing I’ve ever seen,’ were the words that flew to Lexa’s brain, but the words that fell from her lips were, “I can get you a robe.”

Clarke frowned. “Okay.”

“If you prefer this, though.” Lexa managed to breathe though she wasn’t sure how. She was never more grateful for autonomic functions because she knew if she had to remind her heart to beat or her lungs to suck in air, she’d never be able to do those things and still keep herself from ravishing Clarke. 

“Well, this does offer more freedom of movement. But if it’s inappropriate, I’ll be glad to dress how you like.” Clarke noticed that Lexa had managed to pick her chin up off the floor. She hoped Lexa’s reaction had been because she’d like what she’d seen. 

“This is perfectly suitable,” Lexa answered and quickly untied her robe.  
As the blue silk fluttered to the ground, it was Clarke’s turn to battle incoherency. She’d already seen Lexa’s perfect breasts but was now mesmerized by the soft tuft of brown curls that topped Lexa’s mound. But it was more than just the Commander’s body that captivated her. It was the sight of Lexa so unguarded. So open. So natural. No body paint, no armor. Nothing. The sheer purity of it made Clarke do something bold. She reached around her back and unhooked her own bra and then tossed aside her panties. “Would this be appropriate?”

Lexa swallowed hard. “Clarke, I . . . I . . . yes. . . of course. . . it’s fine.” Lexa wanted to tell her how much she loved her, how much she wanted her. But she’d reached out to Clarke before only to be told that Clarke wasn’t ready. And then, Lexa had left. Left her to face the Mountain alone. Although she’d apologized and knew that Clarke had, in part, forgiven her. Lexa didn’t feel she had the right to proposition Clarke again. No, if they were going to move forward from this dance they’d been performing for the past couple of weeks, it was going to have to be Clarke to take the next step. 

“Good. Let’s do this, then,” Clarke patted the furs.

Lexa nodded and climbed on the bed and lay face down.

With her hair pulled up, her back and neck tattoos were fully visible. Clarke couldn’t help but run her finger up the intricate tattoo that ran along Lexa’s spine. “This is beautiful.”

“I got it when I became Heda.” 

“And this one?” Clarke fingered the infinity symbol.

“The sacred symbol, the symbol of the Commander,” Lexa clarified.

“Infinity?” Clarke new the symbol primarily from math class. 

“It’s to signify that death is not the end. When I die, the Commander’s spirit will live on in the next Heda,” Lexa explained.

“You said before when we faced Pauna that your spirit would choose the next leader.” Clarke reached into one of the warmer bowls and slathered the hot oil in her hands 

“Mmm Hmmm,” Lexa answered as she felt Clarke straddled the back of her thighs and then Clarke’s hot hands start working on her lower back. 

“So, the last Commander chose you?” Clarke continued her line of questioning. She figured talking about something completely removed from the fact that Lexa lay beneath her totally nude was the only thing that was going to get the fact of Lexa was lying beneath her totally nude out of her head.  


“That’s right.” Like Clarke, Lexa found that focusing on the conversation was helping her keep her sanity. 

“But you also have to fight for the position, at the conclave?” Clarke’s hands moved from Lexa’s lower back up to the middle of her back working out the tension.

“Yes, the last living Natblida is named Heda.” Clarke’s hands were firm and strong. Lexa was surprised to find that Clarke was such a skilled masseuse. “This feels wonderful but you don’t really have to massage me. It’s more about saturating my skin with the oils.”

“Oh, I’m sorry. I didn’t know,” Clarke moved off of Lexa’s thighs.”

Lexa felt Clark’s downy curls brush across her leg as Clarke moved. Her center pulsed at the contact. “Don’t apologize, Clarke. You weren’t doing anything wrong. I hadn’t explained it properly.”

“How would Costia do it?” Clarke asked.

“You’re not Costia, Clarke,” Lexa answered matter-of-factly.

Clarke’s face went flush as if she’d been slapped. Tears stung at her eyes. She swiped at them to keep them from falling. The action had been a mistake. The oil burned instantly. “Shit,” she cried when she realized her mistake. She rubbed at the eyes harder trying to get the oil out which only compounded the matter. She couldn’t see at all, everything was blurry.

“What’s wrong?” Lexa rolled over and then sat up when she saw Clarke’s distress. “What happened?” 

“The oil, I got it in my eyes.”

Lexa hurried into the bathroom and grabbed some washcloths and a bowl of water.  
“Quit rubbing at them,” she ordered when she returned to the bed. She handed Clarke a wet cloth. “Here, wipe your hands first. Then tilt your head back, I’m going to flush your eyes. And, why would you do that, anyway?”

“I wasn’t thinking.”

“Clearly,” Lexa shook her head as she poured the water into Clarke’s sky eyes.

Clarke took one of the dry towels and patted her own eyes. She blinked a few times and then tried to see out of them. Her eyes still burned like crazy but her vision was less blurry.

“Do you want me to flush them again?”

Clarke nodded and held her head back. 

It took three more flushes before Clarke could quit blinking her eyes in pain. 

“I’m sorry, Lexa. Now I’ve really screwed things up.”

Lexa looked out the window. It was afternoon, now. And she still had to get dressed and put the rest of her plan in motion. “You haven’t messed anything up. You’re doing everything perfectly, Clarke. Well, except the trying to blind yourself part. Leave that out next year, okay?”

Next year? Clarke’s heart soared. Lexa wanted her to do this next year? But she’d just told her she wasn’t Costia. And it wasn’t that Clarke was trying to replace Costia but she didn’t want to fall short either. “I promise.”

“Here, have a seat. I'll finish with the oiling.” Clarke sat at the foot of the bed and soon her eyes were burning with a new kind of fire. Lexa slicked the oil up her toned calves like a painter brushing fine strokes on a canvas. And, even though she felt like a complete voyeur, Clarke couldn’t look away. 

There was something in the openness with which Lexa worked the oil into her skin unabashedly in Clarke’s presence that made Clarke open up to the woman. “It was Costia. Or rather my hang-up over Costia. You said I wasn’t her. And, I’m not trying to be her. I’m not. I know that no one will ever take her place. I just didn’t want to disappoint you.”

Lexa stopped moving her hands over her body and scooted down to the foot of the bed so that she was nearer to Clarke. “I don’t want you to be Costia, Clarke. I want you to be you. You don’t disappoint me. Can’t you see that? Can’t you see? You say you can read me and yet you either can’t or you don’t want to see.”

“I’m afraid to see, Lexa. I’m afraid you’ll take it away from me again,” Her blue eyes pierced Lexa.

“I told you. I’ll never betray you, again. Clarke, things are different now. Your people are my people. Don’t you see that’s why it was so important to me for Skaikru to become the thirteenth clan. I never wanted to have to choose my people over you again. And of course you’re not Costia. Because you are you. And that’s not just enough, Clarke. It is everything.” 

“Everything?”

“Yes. to me, it is.” And even though Lexa wanted nothing more than to dip her lips down and claim Clarke’s mouth as her own, she waited. Thankfully, she didn’t have to wait long. Clarke climbed on top of her lap and crushed her mouth against hers, tasting the truth of Lexa’s heart.  
Lexa returned the kiss with matched fervor. She let her hands drink their fill of Clarke’s body. She’d been aching to touch the Skaigirl since she’d sauntered into her war tent months ago. Lexa ran her hands down Clarke’s back, up her thighs, and over her ass before Clarke even broke the kiss so that they both could breathe. 

A million thoughts ran through Clarke’s mind but she was afraid if she gave them voice that the spell would be broken. So she pulled Lexa’s mouth to her again but explored it more languidly. She could feel Lexa’s gentle and loving hands moving up her back and into her hair. Mirroring Lexa, she ran her own fingers through Lexa’s thick mane, placing her hand at the back of Lexa’s neck pulling her in ever closer. 

Lexa hadn’t wanted their first time to be rushed but her body demanded release. She could feel Clarke going wet on her lap and it only caused her own center to swell and throb as it grew slick from Clarke’s kisses. There were so many things she wanted to do to Clarke’s body and carnal images flitted through her brain but she wanted Clarke to have control. She needed to know what Clarke wanted from her. This wasn’t about what she wanted from Clarke.

Lexa was able to rend her mouth away from Clarke’s hungry lips, “Clarke?”

“Shhh, don’t talk,” Came Clarke’s reply as she pushed Lexa back against the furs. Clarke read Lexa’s need in the liquid in her eyes. The tears had surprised Clarke but they had said more than any words could ever have. Lexa loved her. This wasn’t like sex with Finn which was as much a celebration of the fact that they had survived than it ever had been any feelings of true love. And it was nothing like the rush of lust that she’d shared with Niylah. This was real. And true. And it was love. Pure love, honest love. A love that Lexa had been cautioned to avoid by her advisers. A love that Lexa herself had forsworn out of grief for Costia. It was a meeting of souls. It was the joining of two hearts that wouldn’t be denied. 

Clarke lay next to Lexa and reached her left hand down to cup Lexa’s sex. Lexa turned on her side to face Clarke and ran her own hand down to Clarke’s center. Lexa knew she wasn’t going to last long. She hadn’t had a lover since Costia. She’d had nothing more than self-pleasure and it had been weeks since she’d even indulged in that. But she hoped to at least last long enough not to embarrass herself. But then Clarke’s middle finger sank inside her and she started moving against Clarke’s hand. 

Clarke was pleased at how ready Lexa was for her. Clarke had been afraid she was the only one who was gushing like a waterfall but Lexa was so wet that when Clarke slid her finger inside her her whole palm was soaked with Lexa’s juice. “Show me how to make you come, Lexa,” Clarke whispered into her lover’s ear as she fingered her. But Lexa was already there. The rhythm of Clarke’s finger moving in and out of her combined with the butt of Clarke’s hand popping her clit with every stroke sent her over the edge. 

“Coming, coming,” Lexa panted and tried desperately to keep her fingers moving against Clarke’s mound but as she found her release all of her muscles turned to goo and she lost control of her hands. 

“So beautiful when you come, Lexa.” Clarke kissed Lexa’s cheek as the brunette rode out her orgasm. 

“Clarke kom Skaikru, what have you done to me?”

“Loved you,” Clarke grinned.

Lexa smiled back at her and then found that her hand had recovered enough to bring Clarke the same pleasure that she’d just given. 

Clarke relaxed back on the bed and opened her thighs for Lexa. It didn’t take long before Clarke cried out her own release. 

The next thing Clarke knew, Lexa was shaking her. “We fell asleep, Clarke. And now we have to hurry.”

Clarke grumbled and tried to pull Lexa back down to her chest where she had been holding her.

“I’m serious Clarke, I still have to dress and you have to go with Aden.”

The festival! The ritual! Clarke had forgotten all about it in her bliss. She sat up. “I’m sorry.” She looked out the window. The sun had moved significantly westward. “Shit, Lexa.”

“It’s okay, we have time. The outfit is there, you’ll have to help me into it and then we will go down to the Commander’s hut. Aden will be waiting when you get there.”

“Aden, where am I going with Aden? I thought as your attendant I had to remain with you all evening.” Clarke protested.

“I’ve got everything worked out. But first we have to get me dressed, Let’s hurry.”

“Okay, okay, but first things first.” Clarke pulled Lexa in for a kiss. 

Lexa returned the kiss but spatted Clarke playfully on the butt. “There’ll be more time for that later. For now, go get the Amazon Queen outfit.”

“Mnmn,” Clarke growled her reluctance but did as the Queen ordered.


	5. Passing

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The festival begins. Aden helps Clarke. Lexa judges suitors. Roan makes and offer. Titus is Titus.

The Polis central square had been converted into an Amazon village. Dozens of thatched huts occupied spaces where there were normally numerous vendor stalls, Clarke could make out symbols of the various clans on some of the huts. She felt bad that Skaikru wouldn’t be represented at the festival, other than her serving as attendant. Although Lexa still recognized them as the thirteenth clan, currently Pike and his followers were rejecting the coalition. Clarke pushed thoughts of politics from her mind as they neared the end of the avenue and the large hut that had been erected there. It was easily thrice the size of the other huts and was set apart from them geographically. It was obviously built for the Queen. 

Clark walked slightly behind the Amazon Queen not daring to put herself on the Queen’s level. Titus walked yet another step behind Clarke. Heda’s personal guard made up the rest of the Lexa's entourage. The sun had fallen behind the treeline and there was a nip in the air but despite the chill it felt like the entire population of Polis had shown up to celebrate. The people bowed and murmured as the Queen passed, some threw flower petals at her feet. Others sought to kiss the hand of the Queen. Clarke couldn’t believe that just hours before she’d been allowed to freely kiss and touch and love the Queen. Her center quivered at the memories of Lexa’s mouth on her own, Heda’s fingers touching hidden places. 

Lexa stopped at the hut’s entrance and turned to face the huge crowd. She looked resplendent in the ornate Amazon Queen costume. The headdress was festooned with feathers from ravens and peacocks. Her black arm cuffs swirled with silver scroll design. The red leather dress fit tightly to Lexa’s athletic form making Clarke’s mouth water not for the first time since helping Lexa into the garment. The black knee high boots were laced with red leather stings. Lexa looked deadly and fuckable at the same time and Clarke saw many admiring faces in the crowd. 

“People of the Thirteen Clans,” Lexa’s opening address caused more than a few grumbles among those who were still uncomfortable with the shaky alliance with Skaikru. Clarke was sure that her presence as Heda’s attendant was doing little to allay their concerns. Lexa either didn’t hear the detractors or chose to ignore them. “We gather this evening as we have in years past to honor Bekka Pramheda and to offer our gratitude that she fell from the sky so that we might live. Tonight we dine, drink, dance, and do our duty,” Lexa glanced to Titus who nodded his approval, “we offer our bodies so that future generations will live and prosper as we have done. And we will prosper. We have wasted far too many years warring against one another. This does nothing to honor Bekka’s legacy and it offers little hope or promise to our young. This is why I started the coalition, this is why I’ve welcomed Skaikru as the thirteenth clan.” Lexa looked to Clarke and Clarke could see the tiniest lift of the left corner of Lexa’s lips but the shine in her eyes told her that the smile was only for her. “And, although you may not realize it now, it is also why we have to accept the policy of Jus nou drein, jus daun. Our legacy will be peace. Our future will be prosperity. Now let the festivities begin.” 

The crowd erupted in applause and cheering although there were still a few sour faces. Clarke noticed that most of those sour faces had scarring indicative of Azgeda. But, there were a few from each clan who seemed uneasy at Heda’s pronouncement. But most people seemed happy to just be having a reason to let loose and celebrate. Lexa seemed far less concerned by the disgruntled Grounders than did Clarke. She leaned in and whispered. “Now you open the hut flap for me.”

Clarke did as asked, pulling back the heavy leather flap and waited for Lexa to enter. Clarke surveyed the crowd one last time. Her eyes landed on Titus who gave her one of his disdainful looks. Clarke shook her head at him before following Lexa into the hut. She was surprised to find Aden already inside, waiting for them.

“Heda,” he bowed slightly.

“Thank you, Aden. Have you brought everything?” Lexa asked.

“Yes, it’s all there in the backpack.” 

Lexa took the black bag off the pallet of furs where Aden had laid it and started pulling out clothing. “The armor?”

“It’s out in the back alley, exactly where you showed me.”

“Good, you’ve done well, Aden. I won’t forget this. My spirit will serve you well when you become Heda, Aden. I promise.”

“Pray that doesn’t happen soon, Heda.” The boy quickly offered.

“I second that.” Clarke really wished that Lexa would learn to talk about something other than her death. 

Lexa glared at Clarke. “Now Aden, give us a minute. Wait outside.”

“Yes, Heda.” he answered but Clarke noticed that he didn’t use the front entrance, instead he slid out of a small opening that hat been cut into the back of the hut. 

“Clarke, you are going with Aden. He’s going to show you where I want you to go.”

“I don’t understand. I thought I was to be your attendant.”

“You are. But you are also going to be my chosen.”

“Lexa, what? Titus will lose it!”

“Titus isn’t going to know that it's you. He’s going to think you are in here, remember. He saw you come in and I am sure his eyes are still trained on that front flap, darting daggers at us right now. You are going to put on these clothes and slip out the back with Aden. He’s going to take you to join the other dancers who will compete for Heda’s affection. Heda will, of course, pick you to be her suitor.”

Clarke’s heart raced. There were too many potential opportunities for something to go wrong. Besides, how was she ever going to pass for a man? “Lexa, I don’t think this is going to work. I mean what if Titus comes in here or. . .”

“He wouldn’t dare. It is forbidden for anyone other than the lovers and the attendant to enter the sacred hut.”

“But he’ll recognize me with the other potential suitors.”

“No he won’t, I’ve got that covered. This disguise will work, trust me.”

“Even if it does, you said dancers, Lexa. I can’t dance.”

“You don’t have to. It’s not choreographed or synchronized. Each warrior displays himself how he chooses in front of Heda and then she chooses her favorite. Its simple. Often Heda doesn’t even let the dancers finish. She just finds the one she wants and takes his sash.” 

“Lexa, I don’t know. I’m not much of an actor. . .” Clarke tried to protest.

“Really? Because if I recall correctly, you conned me the first day we met.”

Clarke chuckled because she couldn’t deny it. 

“Now hurry, take your clothes off. I’ll help you into these.”

Clarke stripped quickly, her nipples pebbling under Lexa’s stare.

“First we have to do something about your hair.” Lexa took an old tin that read Kiwi on the top out of the bag and opened the lid. She slathered her finger into the dark brown goop in the tin and started running her fingers through Clarke’s blonde hair. When she was satisfied that she’d knocked off the glaring shine of Clarke’s golden mane enough to make her unrecognizable as her favorite Skaiperson, Lexa pulled out a long strip of bandage and started wrapping Clarke’s breasts. “This is going to feel really tight but the good news is, you won’t have to wear it for long. Just long enough for you to pass as a man.”

“You wear this in battle?” Clarke had remembered Lexa mentioning taping her breasts.

“Yes, usually. How does that feel?”

“It’s snug but it’s okay.”  
“Well, if you didn’t have such big boobs, Clarke.”

“You don’t like them?” Clarke teased.

“Oh, I’m gonna show you just how much I like them when I get you back in here.” Lexa placed a promising kiss on Clarke’s lips. 

Clarke looked down at her chest. For the first time, she was starting to think that they could actually pull this thing off. “Not tonight. Tonight, I’m the man, remember. I’m gonna show you how much I like your breasts, Lexa.” 

Lexa’s lips pursed and Clarke saw her throat move as she anticipated being beneath Clarke. “You are such bottom, Lexa,” Clarke whispered.

“Only for you,” came Lexa’s quiet reply.

“I think it’s beautiful and I don’t take it lightly.” Clarke cupped Lexa’s face in her hands. “I’ll be the suitor of your dreams tonight.”

“You already are, Clarke kom Skaikru. Every night.”

Clarke wanted to throw Lexa down on the soft pallet that lay near the hut’s central hearth but she knew it would have to wait til later. “Let’s get me dressed. The sooner I get out there, the sooner I get back in here.”

Lexa nodded and grabbed a pair of breeches and tossed them to Clarke. 

∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞

It only took Clarke and Aden another twenty minutes to get her armor outfitted and her blue sash tied around her waist. Clarke would have killed for a mirror but looking down at herself, she had to admit that she looked like any other Trikru gona. Aden had even inked a temporary tattoo on her face using one of Lexa’s kohl sticks. As long as Clarke stayed on the opposite side of the central square from where Titus stood watching the festivities, she was certain that he’d think she was a regular suitor. 

“Thank you, Aden.” 

“You’re welcome. Permission to speak freely?” Aden asked.

Even the children were formal. Or maybe it was because Aden had grown up like Lexa, robbed of an actual childhood. His life had been about duty as long as he could remember. “Of course, Aden.”

“I think you are good for Heda. I know it goes against our teachings but since you came into our lives, I’ve seen her smile. I didn’t know that she could. Your secret will always be safe with me.” He held out his hand for a formal handshake.

Clarke took his arm, clasping forearm in forearm. “She makes me smile too. I won’t forget this, Aden. And neither will Heda.”

Aden nodded. “Now you just line up with the others. You will see them. Heda is probably already watching their performances. Just take your place in line and wait for her to signal you. She’ll know you by this sash.” Aden fingered the silken fabric. 

“Here goes,” Clarke took a deep breath and headed into the fray. Aden skulked off into the darkness. 

∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞

As Aden had predicted. Lexa was already assessing potential lovers. The gona dancing before her was twirling twin blades impressively. Clarke had only ever seen two other warriors handle swords that skillfully, Lexa and Roan. 

Speaking of Roan, he was in line with the other would-be lovers. Clarke shrank back out of his sight. What was he doing? Of course, he thought sending Emerson to Lexa had signified a truce between them and in essence it had. But why had he returned to Polis for the holiday? What was he thinking? Did he really think Lexa would choose to bed him? Maybe he was jockeying for a political marriage. But all the Grounders knew Titus’ mantra. “To be Commander is to be alone.” No. Roan, as bold as he was, wouldn’t presume to wed Lexa. But bed her? Maybe. Produce a child with her? He’d likely consider that. Their offspring would not only be an heir to the Azgeda throne. It would also likely be a Natblida. Clarke knew his courting was futile but it irked her nonetheless. 

Roan’s presence among the suitors presented an unexpected problem and Clarke’s original misgivings about the whole ordeal resurfaced and sent her heart pounding in her chest and her ears. Now, she had to steer clear of Titus and Roan! 

She faded back farther in the line. Which was fine, she told herself. She needed to improvise a dance anyway. All of these gonas were much more gifted than her with their weapon of choice. Clarke looked at the suitor who had been behind the dual sword wielder. This gona was an archer and he presented his bow before Heda then took three arrows and lit the tips of them on fire. He shot them straight in the air, quickly cast his bow aside, grabbed a shield and ran across the square catching the flaming shafts as they returned to the earth. Everyone cheered at the theatrics. Clarke only rolled her eyes. She had no special skill. She was going to look like a complete loser in comparison.

Clarke reminded herself that it didn’t matter. Lexa was going to choose her anyway. It was prearranged. But it still bothered her than she didn’t have a show prepared to honor Heda. 

Clarke wracked her brain trying to come up with any idea that would suffice.

She looked back to Lexa who was looking down the line searching for her. But Roan stood between them catching Lexa’s attention. 

“King of Azgeda,” Lexa smirked.

Titus’ head snapped up. He dared to edge closer until Lexa shot him a warning look. The priest had no role to play in the ceremony. The right to choose a suitor was Heda’s alone. 

“Heda. Commander of the Thirteen Clans. Azgeda has come to honor you and Bekka Pramheda this evening. I’m not much of a dancer Heda but please accept these thirteen elk. One for each Clan.” A wrangler pulled the beasts into the square. And they were healthiest animals Clarke had seen since arriving on Earth. If Azgeda had an abundance of good meat such as that, that explained why their warriors were so formidable, Clarke thought. 

Clarke heard grumbling from some of the other clans. Some people whispered bribery. Others decried his offer as arrogance. But Lexa thanked Roan for his offer and called to one of her gonas to make sure that the animals were distributed correctly. 

“Thank you, King Roan,” Lexa nodded. “Next.”

Clarke saw Roan grin but she knew it was one of his disappointed grins and not a grin of pleasure. He had actually thought that Lexa would choose him. Clarke was happy to see him taken down a notch. She watched as he walked to the edge of the square and talked to a woman warrior. After a brief interchange, the two took the avenue that headed to the north of town. 

With Roan gone, Clarke relaxed a little. But she still had Titus to look out for. She knew he would be watching with great interest whomever, Heda chose. Clarke looked across the square. If only she could find a way to get Titus drunk! Now there was a thought! An inebriated Titus. Clarke wondered if she could convince someone to get him all liquored up. She looked around the square and saw plenty of people enjoying what she was certain were alcoholic beverages. One gona took a swig from a silver flask. The flask gave Clarke a surprising idea. It was dangerous but she thought she could make it work. But first, she needed some booze!


	6. Dragon

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Clarke is Heda's chosen.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I want to thank all of you who read and left comments or kudos for this story. It really enjoyed exploring this idea of a Grounder Holiday. This is the final chapter in this tale. Thank you!

Last Winter’s Moon: 6

Clarke scanned the revelers searching for someone she could beg some booze off of. Most of the gonas were dancing, doing their best to impress either Heda or some other lover whom they hoped to woo for the evening. Clarke noticed two female gonas were dancing provocatively. It reminded her of the things she and Lexa had done earlier in the Commander’s bed. But she didn’t have time to blush. The line between her and Lexa was growing ever shorter. She needed the alcohol and she needed it fast. 

Finally, she spotted an old woman sitting at the end of a long table. The woman was swaying back and forth to the rhythm of the beating drums and the humming flutes. Clarke was fairly certain that woman had taken one too many swigs from the jug she held in her lap. As Clarke approached the elder, she noticed that her eyes were glazed over, the woman was blind. It stopped Clarke in her tracks. She knew that the Grounders generally treated such maladies as mutations and banished the suffer from their lands. Clarke wondered how the woman had escaped such a fate. Perhaps she’d lost her eyesight later in life, Clarke mused as she tapped the woman on the shoulder.

Deepening her voice as much as she could, Clarke asked, “Could I borrow your fayawoda?”

“For a kiss, yongun!” The woman turned her puckered lips up to Clarke, “I can still honor Bekka Pramheda if you want to give an old woman a thrill.”

“Just the kiss, I have my sights sat of Heda,” Clarke reached down and smooched the old lady.

“Don’t they all,” the aged lady cackled. “But your lips are soft and Heda might take a shine to you. If not, you know where to find me.”

“That I do,” Clarke grabbed the jug and shook it to make sure there was any alcohol left. She was happy to find that she hadn’t kissed the wrinkled mouth for nothing. 

Liquor in hand, Clarke marched back into the queue for Heda’s attention. A particularly acrobatic gona was dancing for Lexa when Clarke settled in near the end of the line. He bent into a full backbend before lifting his legs into the air and doing a handstand. From the handstand he lowered himself into headstand. Lexa didn’t look especially impressed but most people couldn’t take their eyes off of him. 

“Em pleni,” Lexa barked disappointing both the would-be suitor and his admiring audience. 

The gona bowed to Heda then scuttled off into the night. 

“Yu,” Heda pointed at Clarke. “Kom hir,” 

Clarke walked toward the Commander with long confident steps. She decided it best to adopt a cocksure attitude. Lexa quirked her lips at Clarke’s swagger. She had to hand it to the Skaigirl. She knew how to put on a show. 

“Heda,” Clarke bent to one knee as she’d seen some of the others do before performing. Lexa moved to the edge of her seat. Clarke was sure that Lexa was about to pull her sash without Clarke getting a chance to perform. Clarke knew that would only arouse suspicion. And that was something she didn’t want to do. She shook her head subtly hoping Lexa would catch the cue. 

Lexa eyed Clarke curiously. Her green eyes reflected the light of the two braziers that burned on either side of her throne. “Do you have a dance for me?”

“Sha, Heda. The Dragon Dance.”

“Well, let’s see it, then,” Lexa sat back in her throne and waited to see just what Clarke had up her sleeves. 

Clarke dug deep back into her memories. She left the jug on the ground near her feet as she stood back up. She started dancing by tossing her head back and forth. The strands of her hair were brown from the shoe polish and they whipped across her face. Soon, her hips joined in the dance gyrated back and forth. Her arms swung in rhythm in front of her. Her whole body seemed caught up in the frenzy. Then suddenly, Clarke reached toward the heavens steepling her hands together high in the air. She then called on her yoga training from gym classes on the Ark. She went into warrior pose extended her arms outward then down to triangle. Coming out of triangle she rushed to the Commander’s hut and grabbed one of the torches mounted at the entrance. As she made her way back to Lexa she danced with torch as if it was a sword. It flickered a couple of times from rushing through the wind but it always sputtered back to life. When Clarke took up her position in front of Lexa again, she turned to the gonas to her right and made a motion that they should clear out of her way. All complied. Swiftly Clarke picked up the jug of moonshine and took in a healthy mouthful before spraying it across the top of torch creating a streaming flame of magnificent fire. 

Lexa’s eyes went wide. She was half worried that Clarke was going to burn her face off but more that that she was impressed by the woman’s daring. The crowd roared and people chanted, “Dragon, dragon!” Emboldened, Clarke looked as if she was going to take another swig of the booze and have another go.

Lexa stood which brought everything to a standstill. Clarke turned to face the Commander. Heda walked forward and took the jug from Clarke and the torch. For a minute, Clarke was sure that Lexa was going to blow fire too, if for no other reason than to show that no one was a match for Heda. But Lexa handed the jug and torch off to one of her personal guard. She then stood straight in front of Clarke and fisted her blue sash in her hand and jerked it hard separating it from Clarke’s other wardrobe.

People cheered. “Heda has chosen the Dragon! Long live Heda, Long live the Dragon.”

Lexa took Clarke’s hand and then nothing in the world seemed to exist but the two of them. Heda led her chosen into her hut. Lexa didn’t even bother giving Titus a parting glance. Clarke was the only thing on her mind. 

Lexa had a bowl of water waiting to wash Clarke up. She dipped a washcloth into the bowl and then wringed it out. She turned to Clarke and tried to wash the kohl tattoo off of Clarke’s face. Clarke pushed her hand away. “Leave it.” 

“Are you sure?” 

“I like it. I kind of feel a little invincible right now.” Clarke was still soaring on the rush that their little con had actually worked and her blood was still pumping hard from the dancing. “I’m Heda’s chosen!”

“Sha, you are, Clarke kom Skaikru, You know you really are like a dragon. You swooped down from the sky and wrought destruction with fire.”

Clarke remembered that it was her burning three hundred of Lexa’s warriors alive that had actually brought them together in the first place. “Let’s not talk of death tonight. Tonight is about living, Lexa. And I want to be alive, in the moment, with you.”

“You’re right, Clarke. Let’s celebrate Bekka. She brought us the chance at life. Let’s not waste it.” Lexa closed her mouth over Clarke’s. Clarke pulled hungrily at Lexa’s soft, wet tongue. 

 

‘Mmm,” Lexa moaned as she broke the kiss. “I just have to know one thing, Clarke. How on Earth did you learn that trick?”

“I didn’t learn it on Earth. I learned it on the Ark.”

Lexa looked at her incredulously. “I find it hard to believe they had fire breathing classes on the Ark.”

“They didn’t but we did have televisions and digital files of old TV shows.”

“I’ve read about TV shows but I’ve never seen one.”

“Well, you would like this one. It was called Xena: Warrior Princess. And she was a badass. Sort of like you. You know, she had a little blonde girlfriend too.”

“Is that what you are, Clarke? My girlfriend?”

“Tonight, I am,” Clarke smiled and pulled Lexa in for another kiss. Lexa let her tongue play leisurely in Clarke’s mouth. The moonshine tasted sharp and hot on Clarke’s tongue. Lexa decided that Clarke’s saliva mixed with the shine was more intoxicating than any fayawade she’d ever drank. She pushed off the heavy armor plate that Clarke wore across her shoulders. Clarke had passed for a male gona more easily than Lexa had thought she would and there was something sexy about Clark all butched up but it was the woman beneath that Lexa ached for. After the armor was gone, Lexa pushed off the outer coat and wasted little time reaching for the hem of Clarke’s long sleeve tee. 

“We have all night, Lexa,” Clarke reminded. She hadn’t expected such a frenetic pace and it wasn’t that she wasn’t hungry for Lexa it was just that their first time had been so rushed that she wanted to savor it this time. They had until morning to enjoy each other’s company in complete seclusion. Clarke certainly wanted to enjoy every blessed minute of it. Clarke removed Lexa’s ornate headdress and sat it aside. 

“I know, it’s just. . . Clarke. . . in some ways it feels like I’ve been waiting forever for you.”

“Lexa, I didn’t even know I was looking for you.” Clarke caressed Lexa’s beautiful face and placed a soft, gentle kiss on her lips.

“I had given up my heart for dead and then you walked into my life and upended it. You sent my heart spiraling out of control. And then. . .then I thought that you didn’t want me. That you couldn’t want me. . .not like I wanted you.”

“Lexa, I think I always wanted you. I just didn’t understand. I’d never been with a woman so when you kissed me I was surprised. First, by the fact of your desire. Second, by the shock of mine.”

Lexa brought her hand up and toyed with Clarke’s stained hair. “We have to get this washed out by morning or Titus will know.”

“Sha. We will.” 

When Lexa pulled her fingers back they were smeared with the polish. “But first I want you. I’ll try to be more patient this time, Clarke.”

“You be how you want to be, Lexa. I didn’t mean to discourage you.”

“Oh, you haven’t, Clarke. Nothing could ever turn me off of you.” 

Clarke’s center flared at Lexa’s promise. “I’ve never wanted anyone the way I want you, Lexa. None of the boys I ever cared for ever came close to this.” 

Lexa untucked the binding that was holding Clarke’s breasts in and began unwrapping Clarke’s body. “I thought my love for Costia would never be eclipsed. I thought the pain would never go away. I drowned the pain with power. I threw myself into the role of Heda. But then I yearned for you after the Mountain. Cried nights for the loss of you. Chastised myself for my childish, girlish feelings. And then Roan put you before me and I knew that I’d never be over you. I decided after you spit in my face that I would do whatever it took to earn your forgiveness if not your respect.”

Lexa finished the final pass of the bandage and Clarke’s breasts sat firm and free between them. 

Clarke traced a finger along Lexa’s jawline and turned the face until the green eyes were locked with her own. “You’ve earned both, Lexa. And more. I love you, Lexa.”

A single tear dripped down Lexa’s cheek and her lip trembled. There’d been a time she’d feared that she’d never hear those words from those perfect lips. “And I love you, Clarke. And I want you to be mine, even after tonight. Will you? Will you be mine?”

“I’m already yours, Babe.”

“Babe?”

“It’s a thing. A term of endearment.”

“Like Ai niron” Lexa stated.

“Yes, my love. Just like that.”

It was Clarke’s turn to lose a salty drop from her own eye. It fell over her mole and lingered on her top lip. Lexa couldn’t resist licking it from the sweet mouth. From there, she trailed her kisses down Clarke’s throat to the delicious twin apples. She squeezed the fullness of Clarke’s breasts as she teased the areola with quick swipes of her tongue before taking the rigid nipple into her mouth. 

Clarke arched her back pressing her tit farther into Lexa’s hungry mouth. 

“Mmm,” Clarke moaned at the deliciousness that was the sight of Lexa feasting on her breast.

While she worked Clarke’s chest with her mouth she flicked open Clarke’s button and slid down the fly of her pants. She inched her hand into the leather. 

“Clarke!” She’d never felt a wetter pussy.

“It’s what you do to me, Babe.”

Lexa grinned. She decided that she kinda liked the ridiculous term of endearment. It sounded both cute and sexy coming from Clarke’s sultry voice. “I’m gonna fuck you now, Babe.” Lexa inserted her long middle finger into Clarke’s narrow well. She hooked her finger and found the soft spongy spot on the back side of Clarke’s clit and drew slow tender circles against the ridges. 

“Good God, what are you doing?” Clarke panted.

“Well, the goal is to make you come, Clarke.” 

All Clarke could do was nod and whimper as Lexa continued to play against the tender erogenous zone. When Clarke’s knees buckled, Lexa decided it was time to take things to the pallet of furs. She slipped her hand from Clarke’s pants. 

Clarke’s eyes popped open wide. “What, what why’d you stop, don’t stop.”

“You’re about to fall over,” Lexa tried hard not to chuckle.”Come to bed, Clarke. And, let’s get those boots and pants off of you.”

Clarke thought her center was going to explode. She was hot and swollen with desire. She tried to clumsily rip the pants off over the boots. 

“Lay down,” Lexa ordered. 

When Clarke finally laid back on the furs, Lexa unlaced the boots and pulled them off of Clarke and then got rid of the offending pants, as well. “Who’s in the hurry, now?” Lexa taunted.

“This is no time to be funny, Lexa. I’m on fire.”

“And I am to keep you that way, Dragon Girl.”

“God no, Lexa. I need you to put the fire out.”

“I’ll see what I can do,” Lexa started working the straps and buckles of the ceremonial dress she still wore.”

“Let me help you,” Clarke sat up and started unlacing the places that Lexa couldn’t reach.” Within minutes they were both naked and unguarded. 

“Spread your legs, Clarke,” Lexa moved in between Clarke’s thighs and pressed her mound to Clarke’s and started bucking and grinding against her lover. The smell of their juices mingling together was an exotic perfume and Lexa thought she could just come from rubbing herself against Clarke but she thought Clarke might need more so she wedged her right hand down between them and let her knuckles rub against Clarke’s clit as she moved against her. 

I didn’t take long for Clarke to start humping frantically. Lexa followed her quickly over the edge. Careful not to collapse on Clarke, Lexa rolled over and pulled Clarke into her loving arms. As she looked up at the thatched roof, Lexa wasn’t sure what the future would bring but she knew that Clarke would be by her side to face it.


End file.
